Hospitality: The Way of Friendship

"Eating, and hospitality in general, is a communion, and any meal worth attending by yourself is improved by the multiples of those with whom it is shared." ― Jesse Browner

If you open the door of your house you often open the door of your heart soon after. I can think of few better ways in life to deepen friendship than through hospitality. Even something like a wild hiking trip that brings friends way closer together through difficulty, it is a form of hospitality where you make each other feel safe and at home in all the small ways you can despite the difficulties you face.

Every time I travel for an extended period I remember in the most extravagant ways that hospitality is one of the most beautiful things in the world. From the time my team of six met a refugee from Afghanistan in Turkey who opened his home to us and fed us a completely delicious meal. They had several kids and only made maybe eight to ten dollars a week by collecting bottles for the deposit, but they gave so generously to us of all that they had. Or the man selling kebabs as street food who fed my team an incredible three course meal just an hour after meeting us on the street and knowing he would likely never see us again.

Last night I was shown this truth again. Jetaime and I were trying to meet our friend Ryan in Sendai Japan, and everything went wrong. Our internet stopped working and we arrived too late. So we couldn't contact him and he waited at the meeting spot, but left after we didn't show up for a long time. We thought we could sleep the night at Mcdonald's because that is what many do, but it turned out this was not a twenty four hour Mcdonalds. All our plans were falling through and it was minus one Celsius and so my plan of camping was looking a bit more challenging. The McDonald's was going to close at eleven pm and we had nowhere to sleep.

We started asking for around for wifi, or ideas of where to stay, but most patrons and employees of McDonald's didn't speak the best English. Finally I talked to one man sitting by himself. He had a quick smile and spoke very good English. We found out later that he was actually a Neuroscientist/researcher and he went to McDonald's because it was easier to stay focused and the more lively atmosphere helped him write papers for journals. He had a hard time putting all the elements of our story together. To be honest, we did too! How did we get to this crazy place of desperation for a place to stay?

I felt a peace that God was taking care of us in the midst of these problems, and indeed he may have been the author of both the problems and the solution! This man at first offered us to use his phone to call our friend, then to research for us a place to stay, then he offered us his place to stay! He was thinking really hard about it before he offered. At first, I thought "Surely, this isn't too hard of a decision. It's just either yes or no." But again, we later found out that he had a big family to care about, and it was already quite late. We also didn't realize how much effort and generosity it entailed when he said "You can come to my place! Please come..."

"Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it." Hebrews 13:2

"As a way of life, an act of love, an expression of faith, our hospitality reflects and anticipates God's welcome. Simultaneously costly and wonderfully rewarding, hospitality often involves small deaths and little resurrections. By God's grace we can grow more willing, more eager, to open the door to a needy neighbor, a weary sister or brother, a stranger in distress. Perhaps as we open that door more regularly, we will grow increasingly sensitive to the quiet knock of angels. In the midst of a life-giving practice, we too might catch glimpses of Jesus who asks for our welcome and welcomes us home." ― Christine Pohl

They pulled out all the stops for us: gave us about four blankets each and a really nice sleeping pad. Showed us how to use a traditional Japanese bathroom and the amazing hot bath they keep ready. At night we had snacks, and later a beer and great conversation with our new host. In the morning we got up to the smell of fresh coffee for us. We met each of their three kids, and the mother-in-law made the most exquisite breakfast for us: the freshest tomato, salmon, egg, salad, miso soup, matcha tea, and steaming hot bacon!!! We took a picture of everyone and the dad quickly printed it off and got us to write our contact information so that we could stay in touch. He gave us a printed photo with them. He shared the area, the history, his passion, and some good laughs with us. When we left, we were so shocked that this family which was filled with complete strangers the night before had become good friends within 12 hours. Their kindness just unlocked new levels of friendship that wouldn't have been possible in any other way.

Sometimes I wonder if that verse in Hebrews goes both ways that we sometime take care of angels by accident through our welcome, but maybe when we are welcomed sometimes it is by the very presence of God and his angels. Maybe we can interact with the divine through the help of strangers.

"Once again...welcome to my house. Come freely. Go safely; and leave something of the happiness you bring.” ― Bram Stoker

- David Hepting